Today I shall be reviewing the merits of Teenagers.
The village has quite a few of these creatures and over the last couple of weeks I have observed their strange rituals and language. I doubt most of us could understand what makes them tick, so I have compiled a list of common traits if you should happen upon one whilst out in the village:
- Uncomprehensible language
- Males tend to smell worse than the female variety
- Drawn to shiny things
- Tend to slouch and use their arms to turn their bodies
- Constantly shout “Paedo” at men hiding in bushes
- Abbreviate phrases, eg. OMG for “Oh my godfathers” and other such oddities
- Constantly hit each other
There are far more traits but until I write my paper this is a good enough guide for you to spot them. I would refrain from communicating with them as it usually ends up with threats, shouts of “Paedo” and on the odd occasion, an officer of the law being called.